Do you keep picking the wrong partner? Dating isn’t easy, and finding the ideal partner is something that lots of people are desperately hoping for. You might find yourself moving from one bad relationship to another, failing to find that special someone to spend your life with. If you’re in a position where you continually date people that are bad for you, it might be time to take a look at your approach to dating and look for something different in a partner. Here are four questions to ask yourself if you keep picking the wrong partner.
Am I too interested in looks?
One of the main reasons you start dating someone is because you’re attracted to their physical appearance. While this is, of course, important, if looks are one of the few things you have in common, it won’t help your relationship develop over time. Instead, you need to spend time getting to know your potential partner to understand what their interests and values are. If you’re only concerned with looks, you will struggle to find a partner that you’re compatible with.
Am I asking the right questions?
When dating, one of the main ways you get to know people is by asking them questions about their lives. If you keep finding yourself dating the wrong type of people, maybe you’re only asking shallow questions and not finding enough information out about your date. You should try and ask questions that tell you more about your date’s character and their relationships, instead of just asking about what they like and what they do etc. If you’re truly able to get to know someone, you need to make sure you’re asking the right questions.
Am I being honest about what I’m looking for?
If you’re not honest with yourself about what you’re looking for in a partner, you will struggle to find it. For instance, if you’re looking for a long-term partner but are wasting your time dating people online who are only looking for a casual relationship, you need to think about why you’re only connecting people with those interests. In the initial stages of your relationship, it’s important that you’re very clear about your intentions, so you can connect with like-minded people who want the same things as you.
Am I being too picky?
While you might be spending your time looking for the perfect someone, you should realise that nobody is perfect! Everyone has their drawbacks, and to find an ideal partner, you will undoubtedly have to compromise on some things. If you find that you’re constantly ending relationships for minor reasons, you’re possibly being too picky and should instead give the relationship time to flourish.
Asking yourself these questions will help improve your perspective and will help you find a partner that you can enjoy spending time. To successfully build a relationship, you often need to look at yourself, and these questions are a good place to begin.